Struggling with women's roles in wartime Odesa: an interview with Eva Bergman about the Way Home Foundation

Hello everyone. This is Matthew Parrish from the Lviv Herald and I have the pleasure this evening to be interviewing Eva Bergman, who is a well-known actress, film director and model, and she has just been to a women's and children's refuge this afternoon here in Odessa, and she wants to tell us about her experiences.

So welcome Eva to the Lviv Herald.

Hello, Matthew. Nice to meet with you.

So can you tell me the name of the organisation you went to meet this afternoon?

Yes. it's the Way Home Foundation.

Can you tell me a little bit about its work?

They do a lot of work. They were a foundation before the war, and during the war, obviously things have changed somewhat.

They have a lot of internally displaced people, women and children. As in any crisis situation, they don't know where to go. Sometimes they are like sitting, they've managed to get to Odesa and they don't know how get, you know, further into Ukraine. They just sit by bus stops. They don't know where to go.

Who are these people?

These are internally displaced people with their kids, with their children. So they end up in Odesa and they connect with the foundation and then they're safe. It's a very sensitive environment. They understand trauma, they understand [similar problems], it's very, very sensitive environment.

How do they make the connection, how do they end up there? You say they arrive on a bus stop, then they end up with a foundation.

I mean, there, there are some children that - there are some families that ended up facing death in [occupied] Kherson. When it was [liberated], there were dead kids floating in the water, you know that.

But you need someone with experience of trauma, regarding your children to be present. But it's also a big weight on the, on the people that do this job because they care. And yet they see dead kids floating in the water. Like, you know, when ...

When the Nova Kakhovka dam in burst in July 2023, as a result of the Russians blowing it up.

Yes.

And that flooded Kherson and caused irreparable damage to many rural communities.

Yes.

So how do these people find the foundation?

Well, it's a bit hit and miss. There's people that don't know where to go, and some people get lucky and they find this foundation. I'm not sure of each individual story that I was told.

For instance, there's like a family with some kids. That are just like waiting at a bus station for a few days and they had no idea where to go.

So they're literally living in a bus station or they're homeless and then they're picked up by the foundation?

Yes.

And what services does the foundation provide?

Housing, love, compassion. All the rehabilitation for their mental health needs. They had these popup books of the little prints and they have these little books in Ukrainian or in the Russian language. I went to visit the little children who were playing, they were from Pokrovsk and Donetsk, and they [were so excited].

So they hurried towards me to look at the books and they were so excited and they were opening the pages and feeling the, looking at the pictures and like, you know, it was so cute. It was so touching. It was like, these children have been through the unimaginable and they're still children and they have like this amazing gift to just be so.

They're enthralled by life in wonder and you give them a popup book and they, they're so, they're so happy and they, it was, it was just so beautiful. It was wonderful. Yes. It was, it was, it was wonderful. And it made everyone happy because the director of the association was so lovely about it. It was quite emotional.

We were both quite emotional after talking about, you know, some of the things that we want to do and things like that. Because it is an emotionally sensitive subject. It takes sensitivity. So that was to be expected. But then these children with these books, just so happy and it just lifts your spirits.

It makes, yeah, you know what? So, life is good. Life. Life is, everything's worth it.

So what were your feelings, when you emerged from your experience today with the Way Home Foundation?

I felt even more connected with Odessa, which as you know I always seem to end up in Odessa and I just, it's a city you love. It's a city I love. It feels like another home.

And why is that?

It has its magical charms. My grandmother's half [of the family] is from Odesa. Maybe that's some kind of something. Yeah, there's some sense of family connection. Yeah. I mean, I'm a tense, tense Ukrainian [in my heart}. Lots of people are tense in Ukraine. It's nothing special. But anyway, I feel very, very close to a Odesa. I love it.

So I always feel at home here, I always feel comfortable. I always, always feel relaxed. I mean, there's times I don't feel relaxed, but everyone comes together when there's a crisis, when there's a really bad bomb, when people are shaken, everyone comes together, you know? And, and I don't see that in many places.

And there's this, it's an old fashioned sense of people pulling together in hard situation. Not everyone does, but in Odesa they do. Yeah, In Odesa they really do. They do. I'm not saying that they do all other places, but in Odesa [they do]. Yeah. I really feel that. I really feel that.

What do you feel that our readers might be able to do to help the Way Home Foundation?

What do they need? I, I think, to know that the war on women is more silent, but it is there.

And what do you mean by the war on women?

Women aren't fighting on the front lines, but they're still like the backbone of society.

Some of them are [fighting on the front line].

Some of some of them are. Okay. There are some women. Some women, we must be fair. So the women who are in front fighting on the front lines. Yes. Some women are fighting on the front line. And I met somebody today who said if she didn't have children, she would be fighting on the front lines. And her husband is on the front lines.

He was going to, but she's got children, so she won't.

You know, some women are the backbone of society. They've got their loved ones who are gone. They're looking after the children. They may have lost their home. They may have lost everything. They may have suffered sexual violence from the Russians during occupation. They may have suffered very terrible things, which these things are very difficult to do a direct interview about, that are anonymous.

So we have to find a way to, to, to tackle these kind of interviews. But this is very quiet, sorry, but they, you know, and just to know that, that even, when that's not the case. There are women suffering and they're just more silent. You're less publicised. It's less publicised, it's very sensitive.

It's quite internal. It's a bit more hidden. You know, they cry more and care more about the men. It's not like, they're like, oh, we've got problems. We don't care about the men. They care about the men more than anyone. You know? It's so, you know, I just think men and women, they need to work together.

And I think one thing that's really wonderful is that this country is taking a very progressive route and they're trying to make strides in doing the right thing, whereas Russia, I mean for instance, this is just an example, like Russia, such a batshit crazy country.

Russia's decriminalised domestic violence, for instance. So it's legal to beat your wife in Russia. I don't think Ukrainians would stand for that. You know, Ukrainians, they're, you know, making many strides to just protect vulnerable women, [The Russians] are just not normal.

There are some legacy issues though, aren't there? Because there is an unfortunately high level of domestic violence in Ukraine.

It's not critical at the moment, actually, it's not critical right now. There's always domestic violence in any country. There's domestic violence in England, there's domestic violence in Ukraine.

There's domestic violence in a lot of countries. [In Ukraine] it's not right now, it is not critical. It hasn't risen particularly 'cause of the war, which is quite impressive. Seeing that there are lockdowns.

You mean curfews?

Curfews, which is similar to lockdowns and then domestic violence related.

You mean [lockdowns] under in COVID?

Yeah. But I think as statistics go, if you go by just statistics alone, there's [no increase]. When men return, um, uh, in return from the front, yes, it's good. There, there will be some issue. There probably will be an increase in domestic violence, which will have to be tackled as best as possible.

Then there will also be an increase in men that need support and women who need some counselling and supporting the men with their injuries. You know, all those kind of things that. To rebuild lives, but for not just the men but for the family.

To go back to my original question, what could our readers do to help this the Way Home Foundation in their work? What do they need? Do they need financial support? Do they need advertising?

What do they need? They're not getting enough support because they need, they don't have enough, they don't have shelters, for instance.

What sorts of shelters do you mean? When, when they have really bad nights of bombs and things like that.

And you have to remember, some of these people have come from like frontline really, really on the frontline. And those days are very, very tough for them, I similarly, I know men who have fought on the frontline, who even in Lviv, when they hear a siren, they, they can't sleep because of flashbacks. And things like that. You know, shelters, they just, of course funds help and I've been to different women's refuges and I wanted to help.

I wanted to be involved with one that I felt really helped whether people that helped whether people really care and they're not doing it for the money but they're doing it. I mean, money obviously helps, so, you know, donations will help. But I genuinely can say that I really think that donations to this, this charity, will go to the right place. There's no other foundation that I have been to where I've been able to give, give my words or regards.

Is there anything else you'd like to say about your experiences from today or your emotional or intellectual reactions to the obviously very moving experience you've had today with this foundation.

I feel it was an incredibly productive meeting. We've made some plans and, I mean, I'm not making any money out of it. You know, I just feel very passionate about women in conflict and the what you don't see and it's this women in conflict is my passion.

As I told you, I have had experience working in a women's refuge during lockdown, and it's an area that I am basically interested in. So it was very sensitive, but I wasn't expecting it. But it, it, it should have been, you know, it was to be expected that it would be sensitive and emotional and the director, you could just see the most beautiful compassion, you know?

I mean that's what you want to see because, you know, it's beautiful. And that touched me in a really, it made me sad and I feel kind of emotionally drained in a way, but at the same time I could feel just so lifted and like, wow, there's really these people that they don't need to be doing this.

And they're amazing. You know, and that's beautiful. And so that people like that really move me and they don't expect anything from anyone and they're they're just so busy working, working, working, helping out I will prioritise that as one of my projects with the filming to get some stories, which is, is well, again, will be quite sensitive.

But there are obviously things like, you know, there are some things that people don't want to speak about directly, you know, sexual violence and things maybe through a third party. So we have to do things like that carefully. But it's important to [make it real]. It's not just television. It's not just like people see on the news, like pictures of bombs and then they just cut off.

But this is like, it's real. And I think it's important to connect that, to get that message across. And so we, we, we think we've got some stories. We're going to do some brainstorming, make some dates, do some filming. We with the interviews and the editing. All of that stuff. Just try and really convey how it is. And and also some people, they've got stories and they just want to talk and they want a voice even in these situations, and, and I think it's important to give people a voice.

Eva Bergman now, I want to thank you for your time and for your very sympathetic and sensitive remarks about, very difficult subjects and also for your support for an organisation clearly doing wonderful work. Thank you very much for your time today. And the readers of the Lviv Herald very much appreciate your warm sentiments and your decency.

Thank you very much.

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For more information about the Way Home Foundation, and to make a donation to their work, please see www.wayhome.org.ua or www.wayhome.org.ua/en.